Let’s get one thing straight right now: I'm not a huge fan of self-righteous people. Maybe that makes me self-righteous for not being thrilled about the self-righteous. I don't know.
Righteous people? I'm a big fan. Note that righteous is not an adjective exclusively for religious folks. Anyone can be a righteous human being! Righteous is synonymous with noble, ethical, good, honorable, decent, principled, upstanding. Whether you're a person with deep religious convictions that you strive to live or you're simply a good person regardless of any religious affiliation, then please keep doing your thing. I do not expect anyone to be perfect, as that would be incredibly hypocritical of me, not to mention disappointing. But if you're doing your part to be a nice human, I am genuinely a huge fan. Or in the words of the leader of the Free World, "Yuuuuge fan."
Anyway.
I happen to be one of those religious types, who I hope is also a decent human. Because I’m well-aware that being a religious person does not automatically equate to being a "righteous" one.
I was super blessed to have been raised by parents, who were (and are) righteous, in every sense of the word. My entire existence, they have taught me to be good. They still do. Their wisdom and insight has blessed my life immensely, and their devotion to what they believe is commendable to say the least. In part because of their devotion to their religion, and because my parents are just good people regardless, they have taught me all sorts of lessons, largely by example, even when they didn't realize I was paying any attention.
They always encouraged me to sit by the person who was sitting alone. They are both great examples of looking out for the underdogs. They encouraged turning the other cheek when people were less than polite, and they taught me to pray to God before I was in preschool. My relationship with Him has been the biggest part of my life and the biggest influence on who I am trying to be. Emphasis on trying. My parents never forced anything, but instead have fostered my faith by living it so well themselves. They have taught me the importance of being like Jesus and what that actually looks like. But, spoiler alert - I have eons to go before I am anything remotely like Him. So please, don't hold that against me.
One funny thing my Mom has frequently said since I was a little girl has always stuck with me. She is known for excitedly shouting, almost in a singing or catchy jingle sort of way, this specific phrase. Anytime I complain about someone being rude or in the wrong, anytime I get frustrated, anytime I have the sass turned up a little too high, my momma responded with her famous slogan: "Kindness begins with....."
And then one of my siblings or I was supposed to race to finish the sentence with, "ME!"
Not only was this fun as a kid, and still fun as an adult, because who doesn't like yelling the word "me" at the top of their lungs? But this lesson that she still reminds me to learn taught me that being kind is valuable. Being kind trumps being right. Being kind trumps being prideful. Being kind trumps being rude. Being kind trumps being judgmental. Being kind even trumps being important. If you get my drift.
Now, you might prioritize kindness differently than that. That's just the way I see it and I cannot speak for anybody else. But spoiler alert: I'm going to anyway.
One thing that has really bummed me out lately has been watching people that I love and respect share all sorts of hate-filled things in the name of "Christianity" that are not even remotely aligned with true Christianity. It seems that a few folks have forgotten to live the 11th Commandment: Thou Shalt Not Be a Hateful, Self-Righteous Idiot.
I am not suggesting that Christians are the only type of people who may tend to exhibit symptoms of self-righteousness. There are good eggs and rotten apples in every religion, culture, neighborhood, socioeconomic status, or professional occupation. Close-mindedness is not only evident in the Bible thumpers on the far right. Close-mindedness goes ALL directions, and I am well-aware that the pendulum can swing both ways.
But lately, I've been extra disturbed and saddened by some of my fellow Christians sharing hate-filled rhetoric. And that's not the worst part - the worst part is that they actually believe they are taking the moral high ground. It's sick and twisted and I'm SO over it.
I know that sharing my feelings probably won't change anyone's mind, but I must say that I do not condone the way many people have chosen to treat others, using the scriptures as an excuse. I would love to know one thing: how on earth is acting like a jerk the same thing as being like Jesus? I must have missed that Sunday School lesson...
People can be so close-minded and condescending, and in the name of religion no less. Now, I can't eliminate this problem, and I've probably inadvertently contributed to it myself before because I am so far from perfect and there is always room for improvement. So, excuse my self-righteous sermon on kindness because here it goes.
Enthusiastically wanting to kick people out of our country solely on the fact they are not white or "American" or Christian, is NOT Christian. Wanting to tear children apart from their parents is NOT Christian.
Treating others as less than yourself because they don't speak English, because they wear different clothes, because their skin color is a few shades darker than yours, because they get married differently than you do, or pray differently than you do, or don't pray at all - those things should all be COMPLETELY irrelevant points in how we decide to treat people. We should just treat people with kindness because they are PEOPLE.
The thing that KILLS ME and literally EATS ME UP INSIDE, SO MUCH THAT I FEEL A NEED TO DRAMATICALLY KEEP CAPS LOCK ON JUST TO MAKE MYSELF PERFECTLY CLEAR - is that not only can people be obnoxiously, hateful idiots, but THEY CAN BE OBNOXIOUSLY, HATEFUL IDIOTS IN THE NAME OF JESUS CHRIST.
If you're going to use the Bible to back up your bigotry, you obviously missed the point. While the Old Testament has some pretty intense stories, the New Testament is by far my favorite part of the Bible.
If you've read the New Testament, then you understand that the entire mission of Christ's life and ministry was to LOVE. And He didn't just love a select group of people. Nope. He loved ALL people EQUALLY. He particularly demonstrated why it was important to love those who were "different," those society views as "lesser," because God loves them JUST the same. Christ didn't hang out with the popular, fancy people. He fished with fishermen. He blessed little children. He administered to those who were crippled or inflicted by diseases. He advocated for sinners and forgave their offenses, teaching others the importance of not casting stones. Yes, he never condoned sin or wickedness. BUT He loved and loves the sinners, because hello?! Aren't we ALL sinners?
The parable of the Good Samaritan illustrates Christ's teachings beautifully. The man known as the Good Samaritan helped a stranger on the side of the road who had been robbed, beat up, and essentially ignored by several other men passing by. One key thing about this story: the Good Samaritan's kindness was culturally unacceptable because the stranded man was a Jew, and the Jews and Samaritans were not huge fans of each other. But the Samaritan man cared more about being kind than he cared about tradition or prejudice. He did the right thing because it was right. He went against a stereotype only to receive no glory or accolades. He didn't do it for the accolades. He spent his own money and his own time on a stranger, a stranger that he had been taught to disregard. But he didn't. Because kindness began with him.
And it begins with all of us, if we simply decide that it does. Yet, how many of us have passed by others who are suffering without offering them any compassion or encouragement or even good manners? How many of us are too busy? Too self-centered? Too "good" to help someone that isn't as important as we think we are?
Why is it that we place ourselves above others and think that because we are a certain religion or color or culture, we are better than those who are not like us? Because, fun fact: Jesus Christ was a Jew from the Middle East. He wasn't white. He wasn't blonde. He didn't speak English. And He was even a refugee.
Just throwing that out there.
I'd like to mention that I have friends, family, and associates on both sides of the aisle; some staunch Republicans, some diehard Democrats, and everything in between. The stereotype that all Republicans are a bunch of racist, sexist, xenophobic, deer huntin', tobacco spittin' uneducated, country bumpkins who beat their wives and don't share their cake is often untrue. And the stereotype that liberals are a bunch of Godless, arrogant, pompous, immoral sleaze bags who love to murder babies and freedom all while hugging trees is also incredibly inaccurate.
We all know at least one person who fits each stereotype. Trust me. I grew up in the reddest county in the country where the 2nd Amendment is taught before the alphabet. I am well-acquainted with the bleak reality of stereotypes. But don't forget to thoughtfully evaluate your own snap judgments of others because some idiot(s) may have ruined it for the rest of the group.
Yes, some of those conservative, white trash, gun-slingin' rednecks can be so kind and so loving and all be darned, so can those snooty booty, arrogant hippie liberals. Amazing, isn't it?
Politics aside, I'm not saying that to be a good Christian you have to adopt 52 Muslim refugees and wear a "Nasty Woman" shirt to church. Although, both of those things sound really fun. Maybe add them to your bucket list.
I'm just saying that to be a good Christian, you DO have to be nice. Or at least be TRYING to be. None of us are perfect, but if you profess to be a follower of Jesus Christ, then let your light shine by being kind to others. Isn't that the whole point of the Gospel? It isn't to force your beliefs on others, it isn't to condemn anybody to hell, and it isn't to judge everyone else's sins when you have your own repenting to do. The point of the Gospel is to treat other people the way that the Savior would. It's a tall order. And trust me, it isn't easy at times. I am not the prime example of how it's done.
All I'm saying is instead of placing yourself on a pedestal as a good, impressive, noble religious human being, maybe JUST BE ONE!
We've already established that religious people aren't the only ones who elevate themselves on pedestals. I get it, I am well-acquainted with the opposite side of the spectrum and the "open-mindedness" that is often more closed than my Torts casebook. But I frankly just can't stand watching people use Christianity as a tool to discriminate and mistreat other people. I know it's been going on for years. (I'm looking at you, Crusades.) But it's 2018 and I think it's time we get with the program.
Under the giant umbrella that is Christianity, there are so many religions. Contrary to popular belief, Mormons are Christians too. The name of our church is the Church of JESUS CHRIST of Latter-day Saints. The Savior is literally the whole point of Mormonism. Because of our belief in Him, we value taking care of the poor and needy; we value the importance of gaining an education; we value the importance of religious freedom for ALL people - including the right to not worship; we value being kind to everybody, period, no matter what; and we value the principle of agency - that men and women are free to choose for themselves whether we agree or disagree. I understand that Mormons, Catholics, Protestants, Baptists, Methodists, Non-Denominational Christians, etc., vary in practice, doctrine, and culture. But for anyone who considers themselves to be a Christian or simply a decent human, isn't being nice the basics? The bare freaking minimum?
It's not as hard as we sometimes make it. If you disagree with someone's religion-great. If you don't like an aspect of how someone lives their life-cool.
Generally speaking, I don't really care about your opinion. I will [generally] respect it whether it differs from mine or not. If you hate dogs or support white supremacy, then I truly have no clue how to talk to you. Ultimately, I care about how you treat other people. But if you worship or live or think differently than me, fabulous. Isn't that the point and premise of this country? Aren't we supposed to be diverse and not divisive?
But when you express your stance on an issue by using racial slurs? By insisting that orphans in Aleppo deserve to be blown up because their parents are probably terrorists, and therefore terrorism is in their DNA? Matthew 18:6 teaches us that anyone who harms little children is in for a harsh sentence from the Big Man Upstairs. It would be better for someone who hurts children that a millstone were hanged about his neck and that he were drowned in the depths of the sea. For the record. Be careful what you say about any of God's children. #childadvocacysoapbox
How about calling Muslims terrorists? Do you even know anything about what Muslims believe? What about all the white trash terrorists committing "heritage-not-hate" crimes? I took an Islam Studies class at my Mormon college and it was incredibly insightful and enriching to learn about a different religion than my own. Turns out Muslims and Mormons (and all Christians) have a lot more in common than most folks realize. Knowledge is power and ignorance is not bliss.
How about calling Mexicans rapists? I have one word on that: WRONG. Google Brock Turner's white privilege and his slap on the wrist sentence and get back to me. Just look at all the creepy white people you know. There sure are a lot who like to brag about grabbing women by certain body parts. And a lot who like to assault women with no consequence. But hey, it's just show biz. If you can't think of any creepy white people, I have a list you're welcome to borrow. Also, if you seriously can't think of any at all, maybe it's time for you to self-evaluate.
Let's discuss presidents of the United States that DON'T brag about sexually assaulting women...I must say that if you were not on the Obama train, fine. I admit that I'm sad for you because I miss that man and Michelle more each and every day, but I concede that you don't have to like him or agree with him. However, it's not okay to be a racist bigot and call our former president derogatory words even though they match perfectly with your Confederate flag bumpersticker. #classy
Disagreeing? Go for it. Disliking? Sure. Being racist? Being sexist? Being condescendingly CRUEL all while quoting SCRIPTURE??? Come on, y'all. I know we all have our sins. But stick to smoking or drinking or cussing. No need to be disgusting toward your fellow men and women.
Having strong opinions is fine but when you're sharing them in the name of Christianity, make sure that the way that you are sharing those opinions actually denotes Christianity.
Nothing about Jesus' life or ministry or love for ALL men AND WOMEN-nothing about HIM ever, ever, EVER excused hate-fueled judgment as "righteousness." Nothing about Him ever allowed racism. Or sexism. Or xenophobia. Nothing about Him ever promoted being rude or conceited or acting better than anybody.
He - He who was and is PERFECT - was never self-righteous. And when those good old Pharisees were, Christ condemned their behavior. He stood up for a woman who committed adultery; he literally saved her life! He defended the defenseless and emphasized that every single soul is valuable to God. REGARDLESS of what each soul has or hasn't done.
When I hear people who read the same scriptures as me, mock refugees or make derogatory, uneducated statements about their fellow human beings, my blood literally BOILS. And folks, it takes a LOT for my blood to boil.
Some people justify their hate with good old patriotism. Look, I'm glad to live in America too. But our nation is far from perfect. I mean, we are #1 for gun violence among first world nations, but is that actually something to brag about? Not to mention, our education, healthcare, and justice systems could all use an extreme makeover.
But let's just say our country was perfect. It still would not be acceptable to exhibit all this nastiness at people because they "aren't American." Because they don't speak English that well. Go to Mexico and try to speak Spanish as well as the locals. Best of luck with that. You'll need to know more words than "tacos” and tequila.”
Aren't we supposed to be a melting pot? Wasn't our country founded by immigrants? Do you think the Native Americans were thrilled about their home being invaded by a bunch of white, high-maintenance British dudes who fought wars and bickered obnoxiously? At least they brought such a lovely housewarming gift of small pox. I'm no history guru, but I don't remember that the colonists really gave the Native Americans much of a vote on immigration. Unless the Trail of Tears was voted on.... #crickets... Now it's awkward.
Immigrants who wanted to worship differently-or who didn't want to worship at all is why we have the nation that we have. That is why they crossed the freaking pond! They were sick of being uniformly told how to live their lives and who to pray to. Some of them didn't even like praying! They were so over the Church of England. That's WHY they came! And if it wasn't for that bunch of rebellious, radical immigrant refugees, where would you and I be?
Finally, I want to drive home with a snippet of Mormon history and I hope it resonates with not just people in my church, but everyone else too.
The early Mormons were literal refugees. They were driven from state to state starting in New York, all the way to the wild, wild west of what is now Utah. I'm still sad they didn't hike a few more miles to California, but whatever. Utah was built by refugees, but before they made it there, many were tarred and feathered, beaten, raped, and killed. They were literally massacred; men, women, and children. The prophet Joseph Smith and several other leaders were repeatedly falsely arrested and imprisoned in deplorable conditions, they were treated violently, and they and their families suffered immensely at the hands of injustice. Why? Because they were different. Because they were new. They were perceived as a threat because they were seen as "infiltrators." With all due respect, who on earth would ever want to infiltrate Missouri? #kansaspride
Especially in their early history, Mormons were very misunderstood and mistreated as a result of how they worshipped. Others feared the Mormons would outnumber them, take their resources, influence politics, and invade their towns. Sound at all familiar? #merica2018
But there's this super cool guy from history that I've always admired immensely. His name is Alexander Doniphan and he was a nationally renowned lawyer and Missouri politician. He was never a Mormon, but he fought for the constitutional rights of the Mormons, because he was a firm believer in the integrity of the law. For Doniphan, the law trumped being important or cool or popular. He believed in fairness, citing the Constitution as his guide.
Doniphan represented Joseph Smith and other Mormons leaders when they were falsely accused and imprisoned. In 1838, Lillian Boggs, the Missouri governor, specifically ordered Doniphan to kill Joseph Smith for something he did not do. Doniphan was the Brigadier General. He refused to obey this command at the risk of his own life and reputation. He boldly responded: “It is cold-blooded murder. I will not obey your order. My brigade will march for Liberty at 8:00 tomorrow morning, and if you execute these men I will hold you personally responsible before an earthly tribunal, so help me God.”
Doniphan advocated for a group of people who were deemed peculiar and unwelcome. He didn't advocate for them because he liked what they believed. He advocated for them because he knew they deserved the same rights and privileges that he had. He advocated for them at the risk of his popularity and prestigious career. Even at the risk of his life! He clearly valued kindness and fairness above being cool. Above being powerful. Above being popular. Above being important. Doniphan valued the law and adhered to it in the strictest degree.
Later that year in October, Lillian Boggs issued the infamous "Extermination Order", which allowed Missourians to legally murder Mormons and run them out of the state. Despite Doniphan's efforts, and the efforts of many other righteous allies, the early Mormons fled for their lives from Missouri to Illinois. Several years later, the prophet Joseph Smith was murdered and the Mormons were driven all the way to the desert and mountains of Utah, where they started to arrive in 1847.
I was born in Salt Lake City, Utah because of those refugees and because of the many allies who helped offer them refuge. And as much as I love to make fun of all the awful Utah stereotypes, the hiking in Salt Lake City is pretty phenomenal, especially because I've never had to hike while pulling a handcart. And Utah culture aside, I'm way proud of that part of my heritage. I don't think the early pioneers were perfect human beings. But I think they were some pretty dang good ones. I don't think their history is perfect. I do think they were unjustly persecuted for what they believed and I am grateful for their sacrifice and courage; and the many "good Samaritans" who stood by them in spite of their differences.
In my opinion, Mormons better be the kindest and most compassionate people to all the other "underdogs" out there; all the other people seeking safety and refuge. Mormons better be willing to stick up for all people and whatever they believe. Religious freedom is not exclusive to Christianity. Remember that.
In the name of Jesus Christ, many people designate our nation as belonging to Him, as belonging to only the people who worship Him.
In April 2016, in a worldwide semi-annual General Conference for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, Patrick Keaton stated: "The Savior knows how it feels to be a refugee - He was one. As a young child, Jesus and His family fled to Egypt to escape the murderous swords of Herod And at various points in His ministry, Jesus found Himself threatened and His life in danger, ultimately submitting to the designs of evil men who had plotted His death. Perhaps, then, it is all the more remarkable to us that He repeatedly taught us to love one another, to love as He loves, to love our neighbor as ourselves."
Brother Keaton continued: "We must take a stand against intolerance and advocate respect and understanding across cultures and traditions. Meeting refugee families and hearing their stories with your own ears, and not from a screen or newspaper, will change you...Let us come from our safe places and share with them, from our abundance, hope for a brighter future, faith in God and in our fellowman, and love that sees beyond cultural and ideological difference to the glorious truth that we are ALL children of our Heavenly Father."
"For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love." (2 Timothy 1:7)
Shouldn't Christ's believers be the most compassionate? The most willing? The most empathetic? Shouldn't His disciples be the quickest to offer aid and kindness to those who are suffering at the hands of fleeing violence and destruction? Those who are humbly seeking room in the inn?
You can agree with whatever side of the political spectrum you want. But please, do not use the Savior of the World to justify the way that you treat other people, when it is significantly less than polite. That goes for both donkeys and elephants.
"Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." (Matthew 25:40)
Okay, y'all. Enough of this sassy calling people to repentance. I need to work out my own salvation. It is my sincere hope and prayer that those of us who profess to be disciples of Jesus Christ will take so very seriously our sacred duty to emulate His love that He has for EVERYONE.
Because, whether your mom sings this to you on a regular basis or not, kindness begins with...
YOU.
